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CHOICE THEORY

Choice Theory, by William Glasser, M.D.,1999 ISBN 0-06-093014-4

Glasser states there are five basic need built into our genes:

  1. Survival
  2. Love and belonging
  3. Power
  4. Freedom
  5. Fun

Glasser points out habits that are harmful or helpful:

Seven Deadly Habits Seven Caring Habits
  1. Criticism
  2. Blaming
  3. Complaining
  4. Nagging
  5. Threatening
  6. Punishing
  7. Bribing or rewarding to control
  1. Listening
  2. Supporting
  3. Encouraging
  4. Respecting
  5. Trusting
  6. Accepting
  7. Always negotiating disagreements.

There is a "need strength" profile in the book that helps identify, on a scale of 1 to 5, the strength of the basic needs. When individuals are two or more points different in basic needs they are considered incompatible on that level or area.  Individuals can get along with each other by negotiating in those need areas.

Choice theory states there are four components of every TOTAL BEHAVIOR:
- Acting
- Thinking
- Feeling
- Physiology associated with the above three.

Choice theory teaches that without changing our actions and thoughts, it is impossible to feel better. When we satisfy one or more of the basic needs, the behaviors we use to satisfy them always feel good.

Miseries people commonly choose:

  • depressing
  • withdraw
  • complain
  • go crazy
  • drink
  • use drugs
  • become anxious - tense - fearful - compulsive - sick
  • angering

Glasser believes "we choose miserable total behaviors because we believe they are the best choices we can make at the time." "What is important is figuring out how you can choose a more effective behavior."

"Talking about what's wrong is not going to change anything. Its like talking about a flat tire, you can talk forever but unless you fix it, it stays flat."

Creativity - dreaming is pure creativity - don't turn it off