IDS 495
 Home Up Notes - Session 1 Notes - Session 2 Notes - Session 3 Notes - Session 4 Notes - Session 5 Notes - Session 6 Notes - Session 7 Notes - Session 8

 

Sticky Situations - Part One

Dealing with divorce 
  1. When our children are going through a divorce we need to get perspective.
    1. We need to make a commitment to not beat on ourselves.
    2. We need to find a personal outlet for our pain.
    3. We need to ask God for objectivity.
    4. We need to keep in mind that the people who need us the most are the grandchildren.
  2. When our children are going through a divorce we need to help preserve and protect a supportive relationship with our grandchildren.
    1. We need to maintain neutrality around them when it comes to their parents.
    2. We need to be a safe place for our grandchildren to process their emotions.
    3. We need to help our grandchildren heal.
      1. They need to consistently see evidence that proves to the that although their immediate world may look like it is falling apart, their bigger world isn't.
      2. We need to concentrate on meeting the three driving inner needs outlined in session two: a secure love, a significant purpose, and a sufficient hope.
      3. We need to be available to those grandchildren who need us more as they are processing their parents' divorce.
      4. We need to be positive! Don't be grim. Be upbeat.
    4. It's important that we protect our legal rights of access to our grandchildren.
  3. We need to come alongside their parents.
When grandchildren come to live with you
  1. Deal with any resentment you may be harboring toward their parents for putting you in this situation.
  2. Make your grandchildren feel like they are in their permanent home, not just visiting.
  3. Don't make them feel  guilty.
  4. Discuss with their mother and father (if they are still in the picture) what the standards of your house will be and how and who will carry out the discipline.
  5. Don't give up hope on your grandchildren's mom and dad.
Making the most of blended families
  1. We need to go slowly, building a careful and patient relationship with these new grandchildren on their time table.
  2. We need to ask their permission to take the relationship deeper.
  3. We need to start fitting them into our daily prayer time.